Keep On Keeping On

Well, I had another doctor's appointment today.  The girls over at OB-GYN Associates of Turlock are really getting to know me.

This appointment was to go over my hysterosalpingogram and sonogram results.  I had already received the results via phone, but I wanted to talk to my doctor in person, and to discuss my next step.  Both results came back pretty good.  My tubes are not clogged (huge relief!), but my doctor is concerned that I'm not ovulating enough each month or that I'm not ovulating at all each month.  My sonogram was supposed to be scheduled around the time that I ovulated, but of course, I ovulated earlier last month (just my luck).  The images showed that there was no fluid behind my uterus (for you boys reading this blog, sorry for all this "woman terminology").  What does that mean?  Well, usually, a couple days after ovulation, there is fluid behind the uterus, and the fact that there was no fluid triggered my doctor to think I may not be ovulating.  Oh joy...NOT!

So, my doctor gave me two options:

Option #1:

To have a laparoscopy done to determine if I have endometriosis.  She is concerned I might have this condition based on pains I have.  She said being on any form of birth control and being pregnant makes this condition dormant (due to the change in hormone levels), and because I was on the pill right before I got pregnant with Ella and then had the Mirena IUD right after I had Ella, she thinks it isn't until now that this condition is becoming "active."  Fun, right?

Or...

Option #2:

Take Clomiphene (a.k.a. Clomid), again, to help induce ovulation.  You may wonder why on earth I would take this drug again, especially since it didn't work the first time?  My doctor thinks it is more likely that I'm not ovulating well than for me to have endometriosis.  She also said with this round of Clomid, she would like me to have a sonogram performed exactly when I'm ovulating (make a same-day emergency appointment in order to do s0) to make sure that I am ovulating.  If my sonogram shows that I'm ovulating just fine and a couple months pass with no pregnancy, she wants Aaron and I to consider an IUI (intra-uteruine insemination).  I haven't thought that far in advance, but I pray it doesn't come to having to make the decision to go forward with that or not.

So, needless to say, I will be going back on Clomid (starting today, once the prescription is ready to pick up).  I can honestly say I ABSOLUTELY cannot stand the way this drug makes me feel, though, so although I'm looking forward to this next step in my journey to conceive, I am NOT looking forward to becoming the emotional, irritable, crazy woman I once was (and yes, Aaron can vouch for this).

So, if my blogs start becoming angry, sad or depressing, that is why.  Haha!  Just kidding (but seriously).

I also want to take this opportunity to thank EVERYONE for the positive feedback and words of encouragement I have been receiving.  Gosh, I can't tell you all how much it means to me.  Starting this blog was going to serve as a necessary outlet for me to talk about my feelings and thoughts that are otherwise so hard to communicate, and I'm glad that you all have received my openness about such a private issue with such a positivity, encouragement and open-mindedness.  You are all amazing people in my life and your comments mean more to me than you know.  You are all a part in the support system I so drastically need.  So...thank you!  I'm smiling.